when a woman who always has something to say is silent, her silence can be deafening

Whenever I read my fellow bloggers sites, I somehow feel so inept.

The bad thing about me is my inability to accept that there are things I can't change, no matter how harsh the reality is that it just has to stay that way and yes, not change.

Sometimes, you see, I believe with my whole heart that there are things that *can* be changed. It takes just one person to change things, and as someone wise once said, it takes one brave person to be the change that they wish to see in the world. And I wish to see a lot of changes, and maybe I cant reach the world just yet, I can at least attempt to reach my university.

At the same time though, I know I know I know I know Im stretching myself too much for it to be healthy. I hate that for me to feel fulfilled, I have to stretch myself to my limits. Its like, not only must I attempt to have satisfactory academic marks, Im also pressuring myself to excel in extracurriculars, student council, have a social life and get enough sleep all at once. WHY do I never get that in college, you cant have social, academics and sleep? Its always two of the three, never all three.

This has left me very much exhausted.

In other news, this year kicked off pretty cool. Its strange that its already the end of March and I reeeeeaaally havent written anything really worth reading about.

My dear readers, btw, I have this feeling that love karma is biting me in the butt, and boy is it a pain.

“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat, “we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.”
“How do you know I’m mad?” Asked Alice.
“You must be,” said the cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.” ~ Lewis Carroll

and after years of wishing hoping praying, guess what.

I have a laptop.

That is all.

Yes, that warrants its own post. ;)

I hope you all have a fabulous weekend. And I love that just when it seems that lifes falling apart it will twist and turn and everything magically marvelously wonderously falls into place.

It was the sort of happy ending that tied up everything neatly and never actually turned up in real life, where endings, if they happened at all, were messy, and love wasn't always rewarded or punished: sometimes it just faded away into the background, part of the great clamoring mass of unanswered questions that eventually you just had to learn to live with if you wanted to grow up.

izzah -- [adjective]: Visually addictive 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

So after a few days of holding my breath, I can breath again. Cleared summer units, have obtained all my needed textbooks, enrolled and registered for the new semester, rearranged my room, helped in the orientation of new students and quite possiblyh scarred some of them for life ;)settled comfortably in the student council office and meetings, have rekindled old friendships and brushing up with the new and so far, 2006 seems to be treating me very well.

So far.

My room is absurdly clean for perhaps the first time in my life.

And love life aside, its like at the end of the day, the parties and the fun and the laughter, its all meaningless little ditties and maybe we'll smile and perhaps we'll flirt and we'll dance and we'll laugh but its all in vain and we all know itll all end up crashing and burning into nothingness by tomorrow.

I really do hope we all have a rocking 2006.